Audre Lorde

Audre Lorde

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

JOURNAL #1

"1. Pretend that you are talking to a blind man and have to describe for him what "red" is. You should use narrative and descriptive writing techniques, and try to appeal to his other senses!"

Carelessly, I misunderstood that the man before me was actually stricken with blindness, asking him a few seconds ago that I was looking for a red scarf. Flustered in an apologetic sense, he still persisted in asking me, "What is the color red?" with a wise smirk as if challenging me a question, a type of question that provokes profoundness in thinking and description. Of course the incapable would succumb and reply with "Well, red is... a color that you see- oh right you're blind, so sorry. I best be on my way and carry on with my life", leaving the challenge out of the matter of which only the determined would be willing to pursue and with a sense of creativity if they wanted to get the job done right. "Red is", I start, "Red is ripe. It is what makes the strawberries and cherries sweetest at their fullest intensity upon biting into an apple exploding with juices and their fruity taste become so overwhelming that the remains stream down from your mouth. As the strawberries indicate ripeness, red indicates warning and danger as well. Cars stop when they see the red light which forebodes their imminent deaths if they continue on. The aggressive bull charges at red with fury bringing the tension between the bull and bull fighter into excessive pressure. Some people choose to be in the red for red can be the best feeling of great passion and intense emotion, the strongest emotion called love. The warm feeling is welcoming as you jump into acceptance to its familiarity like gathering close to a fireplace in a cold, blue, winter. Red is so extreme that it is the only color in the hue spectrum repeated again in opposite ends, from love to hate. Red is experienced when hate consumes your body, heatedly shaking fists and heavy breathing. Eyes go bloodshot, and then there's a strike, thick warm liquid riddled with red trickles down your hands. Intense, extraordinarily vivid, and the inversion of blue; calm and dull, that is what red is."

JOURNAL #2

2. How does competition function in our society? To what extent is it healthy/unhealthy? Offer some real world examples taken from your life, community, culture, state, nation, or world.

Competition is what strives and pushes the human mind to the best of their abilities. As a developing artist, the people who had similar skill to me were pitted against me as competition. The surreal moment of seeing your idolized favorite artist since you were a kid eye to eye hits you which could not be achievable without competition, and competition is always present then, always wanting to be on top, a way of unrest because there is always someone better. As a child, I recall that most of my relationships involved competition. The jealously grew for the need of looking down with a condescending glare with a smirk of triumph, the desire to be better, and the way we foolishly push ourselves to best the other, forming a rivaly. That is not to say rivalry is unhealthy as there are friendly rivalries unless turned rotten if there are no accepted truces and forgiveness. Competition may obstruct a pure relationship; however, competition provides self improvement in skill and character when it makes people realize that they are not the best and provides a reason to enact in efficient work ethics if they actually acknowledge the competition. People can take competition in both ways, to climb higher or remain in their spots with no will, and acceptance to their position. 

Growing up, there is a broader sense of competition in the outside world than personal conflicts. Competition is undesirable when it comes to the search for careers. The fear evoked when there is high competition for a certain profession cause students to stray away from that profession when they think of their future in such a dilapidated economy. Even with a mindset to fight efficiently in the game of competition, the high competition would not make them rise to where they could have been if competition was at a decent level. High competition actually challenges people to do the impossible, and whether that is achieved depends on the determination of the person. Competition is present in business enterprises, as companies try to sell out others and when there is no more competition at the moment of time, a monopoly is formed. The absence of competition, in a sense, is harmful to society. While competition may seem brutal, competition is necessary for order in society and self-improvement.

JOURNAL #3

3. How have you taken something that you have learned in the classroom and integrated it into your nonacademic life?

I tend to fictitious world-building and story making to further develop my creativity; I do this in my free time and self leisure, and for no one else. To create my own fiction world I must consider the historical elements from the presumably beginning of time to the possible end of the story line. Cultural implications arise first for language is contingent just as culture, and how beings unite is a matter of politics of which learned throughout my history classes, reflecting with the real world's history; however, with a twist because that is how original concepts are made. When getting into the specific stories of certain constructed characters, the Theory of Knowledge class is integrated into how problems arise just as knowledge issues. If a story cannot be seen through the light of TOK then how is it considered infallible (in my tastes) then? Considering knowledge issues help in preventing plot holes and fallible conclusions; yet, in a way, make the littlest of issues into a broader and significant implication that parallels real life. The TOK class also helps in identifying conflicts. In one of my most recent projects, a character is conflicted with ethical implications based on her own perception in brash conclusions of what she observes. Of course, English class can be implemented in actually putting down the ideas in acceptable prose, and to consider figurative and literal writing; and rhetorical analysis in appropriate language with a wide range of vocabulary at hand. Science also plays a role, with the field's consistency to compare its own concepts to similar ideas to make their's understandable to allow creation of eccentric characters that personify those ways of acquiring scientific knowledge and the concepts of science itself at hand. Studying scientific models, in biology most specifically, guide a more distinct drawing style as the microscopic figures retain a surrealistic style with an adorable sense such as the color-coded and possibly symbolic figures of animal cells and blastulas appear. Sometimes I think I am only excited to learn in all fields of education just for the sake of somehow implementing it in a story.

JOURNAL #4

4. If you could go back in time and be someone in history, who would you choose to be? Why?



If I could go back in time and be any historical person in the past, I would be Jesus, to fulfill the science/religious theories explaining the phenomenon of Jesus involving time travel, especially developed in the book, Mission. I will be the one to succeed this mission ... yes... it will be me.

JOURNAL #5

5. If you had the responsibility to decide where $1 million should be spent to improve conditions somewhere in the world, what project(s) would you choose? Why?

JOURNAL #6

6. How have you tried to effect change in relation to an issue of personal, local, or national significance?


Addiction is destructive as it gnaws the human mind to make unnecesary leisure a neccesity. One thing I had to change if I wanted to be successful in the adult world was ridding of internet addiction. This is the new age of distractions because of these new technological innovations that were made only for the sole purpose of leisure. We don't neccesary need these devices such as music players, iPads and iPods, and most entities of the internet; however, a devoloped addiction to these time suckers make our minds make it a necessity. Internet addiction is destructive because being prone to it enacts extreme laziness than doing more important requirements in life such as homework or even caring for yourself; however, quitting is hard because the internet is tempting and alluring. The internet offers an overwhelming amount of entertainment and information that can be easily mismanaged and misused. The internet makes it even harder so to stray away from if a class requires an assignment that utilizes the internet. In recent years, it seems that people are blaming the internet for our developed short attention spans; however, the internet is too much of a guilty pleasure for anyone to take extreme action on the issue. In statistics, work enviroments that have access to the internet are more prone to have employess spending time on it ineffeciently for almost more than an hour a day.

In partaking in the IB program, I had to change my work habits drastically and one of the main things I had to change in effect was my internet addiction, of which I'll miss the days of hours of entertainment and conversing with internet peers; however I would be able to see a future of productivity and a lost of self regret and depression if I gave up the internet.To take action on changing internet addiction within myself was to lock my laptop in my closet and out of my sight on weekdays, and I could only access it on the weekends if all work was done. The addiction of the interet is not fully terminated in my mind; however, I have taken the first step of identifying the problem and admitting it. Unfortunatly, the rates of internet addiction seem to be increasing nationally and almost internationally, so I am not the only one alone. Fortunatly, there are organizations that formed in the last couple of years to provide treatment and recovery to internet addiction.

JOURNAL #7

7. If you could introduce one new idea or material thing to a primitive culture, what would it be?

There are some mistakes made in history that later roll into a gradually growing ball of more problems, grown too large to handle and mend to a pure state in the present. One concept that would be helpful to introduce to a primitive culture is the equality of all regardless of gender. This especially applies for mending misogyny. The first concepts for gender roles in primitive societies were divided into hunting and gathering and then along the road came patriarchal societies. Because of the long bane of existence of patriarchal societies, women are still discriminated to an extent today. Appalling as it seems, some present men are literally led to believe that women are useless and only meant to serve men. Just as well, patriarchal societies create gender roles and social constructs between men and women, dividing the gap of equality even more. Gender roles are gradually changing today and sexism is starting to be less harsh than before; however, if it weren't for patriarchal societies, then this type of thinking would not have ever arisen, as seen in the past where women were told to be solely dedicated to their domestic household and husband instead of outreaching and dreaming of bigger aspirations.


JOURNAL #8

8. If you were to describe yourself using a quotation, what would that quotation be? After you have chosen a quote, then write a bit about how it relates to you and reveals what kind of person you are.
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JOURNAL #9

9. Given the authority to establish a holiday, what would you choose to commemorate? Why? What would the celebration look like?

Certain holidays commemmorate outstanding people based on their achievements usually within their nation. That is why there should be a holiday established about our own self worth, the true "independence" day, where it takes a day to observe our own achievements for the experienced and our free will and a time for people to realize what they can achieve if they think they have not achieved anything and to realize their own self worth and to utilize it well. Surprisingly there is a fair amount of people out there that do not realize they have achieved anything, most cases it is true, and in some cases they are not. It will be akin to labor day in manner where not only laborers, but rather everyone takes a day off because of their contributions to theirself, as egotistical that may sound, but just as people celebrate their collaborative efforts, they should be able to commemorate their independent power of themselves.

JOURNAL #10

 10. What is the best advice you've ever received? Explain. 


The best advice received is from the words of Dr. Seuss: "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." Many people get over their heads that in laying a foundation of a relationship they get self-conscious of people hating them for who they actually are and mask their personality, even to an extent of completely changing who they really are despite hating it. In this case, a person taking this approach should not continue in initiating a relationship with that person, for that person minds and therefore does not matter if they wanted a close relationship. I take heed to this quote because I want to express that I am different but in a way that people that are as different as me will be able to relate to me; therefore, those people would matter.
The quote aids in voicing opinion and to not overthink what other people say not only in relationships, but through actions importantly. Without the lack of confidence, one can never speak up or suggest solutions in a time in need, such as when a team is crumbling because there is no leadership established since no one is willing to speak up. Some cases, people who are unwilling to speak up are scared to do so because of the fear of disturbing the minds of others and causing abominable sentiments. 
This advice is important to me because as someone who wants to be more assertive, the paranoia of the opinion of others overwhelm me to not expressing my opinion because of my history of always emanating
a quiet demeanor, and it would be more pressing for me to speak up for me now as awkward tensions in my brain and throat are pressing.
 The quote also advises people to be more of an individual and instead of not letting their opinion left unheard, they can speak up for themself. The quote provides a confidence boost in myself and not only can it be applied to finding successful social bonds, it also paths a way to being a leader who can strive to fix problems. I try my best to heed this advice to its fullest potential despite the destructive nature I have left in the past.

JOURNAL #11

11. Ask and answer the one important question that a university won't ask you, but you wish they would.
(actually I am aware that a college/university would ask you this question... I misinterpreted the prompt... I think I answered the complete opposite of what the prompt intended oops!)

Why have you chosen your career and profession?

Throughout the course of my life, and I do believe this applies to many students, feelings of pressure and stress involved in fretting with "what should I be when I grow up?" has put me in fear of growing up into the adult world. Even so, as the time between the transition from a high school student to a  college student drew nearer, I still felt undecided. There are a main two factors as to deciding one's profession in my mind: the amount of money that is made from the profession and the passion for the profession, and if one of is lucky enough, these factors both work well. I decided to go with the latter and disregard the amount of money the profession inquires and go with what I have a strong passion for. Despite hearing of the constructed myths and possible truths based on assumptions or experience with the profession of other people, I will still not let them discourage me into getting me to saying that I want to be an artist when I grow up. It would be irrational for me to say that I want to be something otherwise because of all the years of dedication in practicing my skill since I was in the fourth grade, and having the mindset of going to an art college with all the known requirements for admission since I started high school as a freshman. My life is consumed with the urge to create 24/7 despite never attending an art class in my life, but the desire makes me self taught; however, I desire to learn more about this profession as I communicate with other artists, either amateur to students already studying art professionally. Sometimes, I am even torn between schoolwork and art, not to say that they do not go hand in hand, but in work habits as I desire to create in the upper-hand; however, I have to understand school work comes first, my hobby comes later. There are some cases where the urge to create is overwhelming and the dream of my hobby becoming career draws near. I have the skill to utilize to the best of my abilities from years of experience, the advice of colleagues, and the sheer enjoyment to create to get a head start into this profession

JOURNAL#12

12. Your life is a movie. Describe the first 15 minutes.

The opening credits are in a sophisticated typographic style, as the title of each profession branches off into the person's name of specified profession of who pitched in the movie in a ticking matter to symbolize the wasting of time. The movie appears as animated with an experimental style consisting of coloured blobs synthesized together to form a general shape that are vivid in contrasting elements; however executed succefully in a surreal and consitent flow in understandment of symbols that can be intrepreted as a human in the foreground. The ambience in the background consists of aesthetic static and ringing sounds that are sampled from television sets that do not function in its intended purpose, and cooperates with the visual background of neon colored blobs on predominantly black as they  break bonds with the beats. The symbolic form of the human appears to be hanging its head down as running drops drip off its head, splashing to the ground into a cyan mess. The screen then rotates in a way the head seems to face forward, yet gravity has not changed in course of the rotation; therefore making the head look like it's shooting blobs off its eyes straight forward. The camera then pans in a close frontal view of the face. Eyes open for a second before zooming in quickly in the pupil to commence the first sequence of reflections in the past as a line of windchimes ring like hell.

JOURNAL #13

13. Write a letter to your future college roommate introducing yourself and your background.


Dear College Roomate:

I definitly hope that I will establish a known existence in your life and possibly leave a positive engravment in your experience in relationship building with many eccentric people. I'll first have you know that I am introverted and that I do not require much social contact otherwise, excessive social activity will make me sick to the stomach so accept my lifestyle of a borderline hermit, which the open and general public do not tend to follow. I may consider myself insipid at times and at other times; an undeniable genius who has lived the fullest to their own experiences; however, people have described me as spontaneous and very comedic and/or a nuisance once they get to know me. I am at full acceptance that I can be annoying because I can apprehend that they cannot understand me, which is not to say that you would not be able to either. I obssess over surreal humor in the form of loving all things conceivable in terrible taste, so I may adorn my side of our dorm with the stupors of irony which I can freely purchase out of the confinements of my parent's abode and budget; however it is in my belief that almost every hip college student strives to appear ironic in fashion because that seems to be the popular consensus in recent days, unfortunatly, as I strive to be as independent as possible.
In my high school days at Castle Park High, the only extracurricular activity I participated in was marching band, not to mention cross country of which I lacked the dedication to stick with for only but a week's worth of practice. I moved up from the bass line to the snare drum, as co-section leader of the drumline; however, not a very confident leader.
I was also in the top 5 of the '13 class until the rigor of the IB programme ruined my position on top due to destructive self habits I developed in previous years.

I hope we become well acquanted as our time spent together will strive on understanding one another and possibly support eachother throughout our college life with a positive relationship.

JOURNAL #14

14. Please describe your reactions/ideas to the following quote: "He does not possess wealth, it possesses him."

Many people strive to be wealthy in terms of abundant amounts of money at their hand, especially in hoping to eliminate suffering the consequences of debt. Once obtaining too much to spend, their lifestyles change for the worst if not utilized correctly. The opportunity to obtain luxury goods is available for the upper middle class, as for the the higher class, they are constantly living a life of spending. "Possess" in the second part of the quote can be taken as negative connotation, akin to being possessed by evil spirits and in this case, lacking in moral. Greed is one of the deadly sins in folklore, and greed for money can be similar to addiction, controlling the way the person lives to aspire in obtaining money in vain. When a person acquires material goods they desire for more luxury and material goods as they gain a taste of sophisticated living. Soon, they forget living their past life as a possibly hard worker in the lower class, if that was how they started off in before acquiring profound amounts of wealth, and then they have become so accustomed to the lavished life they forget what suffering was like so they try to run away from the hardships of life by buying more luxurious goods to hide from the truth. Because of their greed for money, they become more curropt. Say for instance, if a person climbed to the top of a business syndicate to become a boss then they would follow a curropt system and justified right to enacting in decisions that only strive for their own company to gain more money, rather than for the sake of the enviroment or the poor. The wealth shrouds the person's vision from seeing what is morally right and rather have motives just for gaining their own wealth. I agree with Benjamin Franklin's quote and that it is accurate as he instructed instructed the for the common people with words of wisdom.

JOURNAL #15

15. What is the most valuable contribution you could make to a college campus? Explain.


College campuses are known for a beautiful and comfortable enviroment that students in high school feel envious to be emerged in as a taste of the imminent college life. I think I would take up to the challenge of contributing to the college by making a mark as a succesful student of this college. It is a clever concept to have students to contribute to their college campus as the students are what make up the college. As someone striving to earn a major in the arts, I would display my artwork done in college to illustrate the dedicated work of the students and to give a signal that well developed artists come out of this college successfull, if my name was ever to be known. The acheivements of students represent the college and provides a higher reputation.

 College campuses are usually first looked into upon arriving, and although people say a book cannot be judged by its cover, it is untrue especially in the case that if a college campus looks delapidated. Because of the bedgaggled look, high school students will not find the college as tempting to attend to as another college with a beautified campus, as I have been tempted by another college because of its well endowed and diverse foliage and botany and awed by achievements displayed. A contribution does not have to be marked visually as the tour guides informed us the accomplishments students did in specific landmarks and buildings. An active role in improving self image is just as what any college wants in order to lure the admission of great students for reputation.

JOURNAL #16

16. Explain a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dillema you have faced and its impact on you.

The decision to dedicate one's life to the IB programme is a risk and an achievement I have yet to overcome. The rigor of the programmd was very pressing on me at first instance. All my free time was terminated from an expanse of 5 hours or more to none. Overcoming internet addiction was a problem as the laptop was my enemy in providing infinite hours of distractions and leaving my homework abandoned. Because of many distractions, my grades were lowered and so was my self confidence in surviving IB; however I took my early days of failure as an experience to learn from to better improve myself. I had to assimilate to the work ethics previous IB students had to take on . I gave up my internet life for better grades and well night's rest. The overwhelming stress because of the change in my lethargic lifestyle strained my emotional well-being into an irritable subject on the verge of exploding in tears; however, I realized that I can experience pain now because pain isn't forever and then later experience relief. The main reason I took IB was because I wanted a challenge, and to overcome this challenge successfully for the duration of two school years will definitly be an achievement to me.

JOUNAL #17

17. Discuss some issue of personal, local, national, or international concern and its importance to you.

Society's will to assimilation to normality is a concern today and can expand internationally. It is to succumb to society's social contructs based on the popular consensus. One example of assimilation to normality is found in the image of beauty. The image of any other than a skinny and tall model is seen as a mutant and undesirable, and therefore women must assimilate to what is considered normal and accepted even if it means mutilating themselves. Likewise if there are activist movements, people who want to fit in the activist crowd but do not actually think or fully support the crowd itself is a form of assimilating to some form of normality because the people are not actually thinking for themselves or understand the cause. It is just like in some instances where a celebrity speaks up their opinion and people mindlessly agree. The assimilation to normality can expand to gender roles, as the popular opinion provides the guidelines of what is acceptable to each respective gender, such as girls wear dresses and makeup, and are neat and organized while boys are aggressive and more exceptional at math. Thinking with these stereotypes hinder the individual to think and challenge beyond these social constructs, only making the invented means more true when in reality, they do not have to assimilate to such "normal" guidelines.

This has an importance to me as someone who takes highly to individual values. Originality and being true to oneself is better than following the main crowd foolishly, especially if it poses as dangerous to one's health and not bringing them to the fullest of potential. As someone who always believed that I was going to always grow up a follower and assimilate to look acceptable in society instead of never taking decisions for myself, I want to prove my past self wrong and that being who you are and understanding every cause is everything, of which the majority of the young and undeveloped crowd fail to do. Such dangerous forms of the assimilation to normality can be harmful to society as the mainstream crowd enacts in laughing foolishly at jokes in the media that include sexism, racism, and rape, all the more contributing to ignorance and unoriginality.



JOURNAL #18

18. If you could choose two things to change about our high school campus, what would they be and why?


I recall, or was at least mislead into believing, that the school two years ago was more active in clubs involving community service than the present year I am in now, despite never attending any clubs in my freshman and sophomore year than this junior year. Actually, I was never informed of all the clubs that existed in this year than previous years, and even so, there are not a lot of advertisements for specific clubs. In fact, since the beginning of the year until the near end of this semester, the same flyers have been up, and almost never replaced compared how there were many flyers last year advertising many events that was taking place in school and outside, such as group outings to watch plays. I recall The only club I only used to acknowledge the presence of was the Alma Mater club, dedicated to beautifying our school. That's what our school campus needs, a cleaned up image of ourselves. I have visited other high schools, and none of them are as dirty as what our high school appears to be, especially from the outside. Some people can argue that other high schools are richer and therefore look more clean; however, I think our school lacks respect for their own campus. It is amazing how students can litter their food in a disarray expecting the sanitary units to suffice to such needs but the litter even travels to the outside of the school, providing a bad enviroment for those walking or driving by.
I think the school lacks spirit in itself in general. I'm lead to believe this because of the record of the football team, marching band, and the basketball team constantly losing, of which are all the extracurricular activities I'm most exposed to. This obstructs are view of what we have achieved; however, and there are just a fair amount of what we achieved and what we have lost that many do not acknowledge. Some examples include our IB programme and the other sports such as cross country that have more than outstanding achievements.
With a cleaner environment and high spirits, our school's self image can be improved.

JOURNAL #19

"19. Should school attendance be mandatory? In your answer, be sure to explore what the function of education is, and what our nation would look like if the masses were less educated."


High school drop out rates prove that some students are incompetent of handling their education proven through their course of their life's actions. In some instances, the overwhelmingly frustration of teachers toward incooperative students quote; "If you don't want to be here, then get out of here", or something similar along those lines. As a country that fully supports individual decisions, I think that students should have a say as well in part with their parents. The parents should be able to decide whether or not they would want their child to go to school since they are more left with experience. Most parents are on full on advocation to admonishing their children to go for they want the best for their child and to lead a better life than theirs as proven through the common suffering and giving away parents have to experience expressed in many works of art and own experience.

Through the course of the school life, an offered education in a system through schools provide developing pupils a choice for higher standards and opportunities in their foretellingly bright futures; however, not everyone can make it. If a student drops out and finally realizes regret, the student has a choice to go back and get an education. Most likely they will attend a community college, bringing up the topic of colleges. Students attend colleges to broaden and sharpen their knowledge to their alleged profession. Just as this I still think a part of an education is required to be mandatory to provide the basis neccesities. If someone was never given the ability to read, then how helpful are they to society besides performing aruous and unskilled jobs. If that person realizes an epiphany that to remain stunted in the lowest rank of society then it his choice to get an education; however will he not be faced with regret that the person wish they had an education sooner? There are people out there that are happy and blissful without an education and people who regret having an education. I think society should construct a mandatory first level of education such as elementary school and it would also be mandatory to provide students the benefits of education to make them continue on with their educational career when off to high school.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

JOURNAL #20



If I were to choose any specie of animal to talk to, I would choose the an amphibian, such as the frog. Amphibians are known for living the best of the underwater world and the dry land above. Most would have to live strictly by the lines of aquatic life such as tadpoles but later grow up not only to adjust in their home environment but to a new territory above the surface of the water. This phenomenal transition intrigues me into wanting to know more of their experience, similar to one growing up in their homeland and moving into a new country; yet amphibians have that instinct where they both seem balanced in adjustment of water and land. Adaptation is harsh to a human be it an adjustment to foreign land or to the alienation of adulthood, and other concepts of drastic change such as assimilation to new culture.

I think that frogs have adaptation more drastic than any other animal, so I would heed advice from it for the entities of adaptation. Another form of adaptation frogs had to develop is caused by humans which explains their rapid decline to being endangered and in borderline extinction. Their acclimation cannot save them from such instances where rainforests are cut down relentlessly, home of the exotic frogs. Their bright warnings in vivid color cannot save them now from the vicious predators that are human beings.
If the frog was interrogated on the issue of such rapid extinction, then his voice would be heard. Actually, if all animals were given the ability to possess the creative minds of human beings, they would be able to write and induce the human hearts as their word on experience is heard, just as oppressed historical figures have done, such as Frederick Douglass.The world of eliminating beautiful nature and rapid consumption of natural resources would take a much different course if all animals who are almost in extinction could speak and communicate well with humans. Sadly, they do not have the capacity of the human mind, making it an excuse to treat animals inhumanely.

In reality, if I could speak with any specie of animal, I would speak to the ones almost extinct. I will record their biography and distribute it to the public and maybe others would be aware and willing to take action.